ABANDON HOPE, YE WHO ENTER
We call it the "Bermuda Triangle" of the toy section. When you are zoning in the toy block, and you go into this certain aisle, you never come out. You become prisoner there until the end of time. [Jaws movie soundtrack rumbles in background]......it's none other than......[eeeeeeeek!] the action figure aisle! (no! please! don't make me zone that! I'll do anything! Please don't send me there!]
On a typical summer evening, kids get bored and rowdy, so parents load them into the car and head on over to our store and let them loose in the toy section just to look around, kill some time, and wear off some energy. Unfortunately for us, the kids just destroy any resemblance of order we have tried to achieve there during the day, especially in the action figure aisle. The team leads always complain to us that it never looks good, but everytime we zone it, five minutes later it's all over the floor again.
DUMB AND "DUMBER-ER."
Retail executives bend over backwards to design their store to maximize opportunities for impulse purchasing by the customers. The only problem is that impulse purchases often include big, bulky furniture that we have to haul out and help the guest figure out a way to cram into their little bitty rice-burner cars from Asia. This evening was no exception. A guy and his girlfriend saw a futon we had and decided on the spot to buy it. I had to stand there in the parking lot and listen to them argue about how they were going to get it into their little sled.
Jeez, people.
Not only are they stupid and refuse to come back with a bigger vehicle before they buy it, but they are the same upper middle class environmentalist hypocrites who rant about SUV's, and then complain when their furniture purchase won't fit into a little chopstick wagon.
AH, HUBBA HUBBA.
Coworker "R" and I were discussing various issues in the grocery block one evening. A hot blonde wearing a bikini top with a bust the size of Toledo walked by. We stopped talking. 'Nuff said.
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